Monday, December 28, 2015

Polite, Persistent and Confident in Achieve Objectives

If we lived in a perfect world people would respect others and treat each other with civility and dignity. Unfortunately, this isn't always the case. People sometimes look for their own advantages without considering the rights and needs of others. This may be an overbearing boss, a company that fails to live by its obligations, or a negative co-worker that creates unnecessary problems. It could also be a policy run a muck! Being polite, persistent and confident can create positive change.

Here is the problem. At a deep biological level we are programmed to fulfill our own needs. When we are hungry we look for something to eat, if we are thirsty we find something to drink, when we are cold we find shelter. Everything else beyond food, shelter, reproduce is socially constructed.

Our needs become increasingly complex as we become increasingly complex. We think that money equates to innate skills, food is a source of comfort, popular friends leads to inherent value, and a promotion means we are worthier than others. 

Because we have these needs, and they are sometimes all consuming, some may overstep their bounds violating the rights of others. This means that getting something, even when it isn't actually earned, is an important psychological source of satisfaction among people who are not highly developed.

This idea applies to things like winning arguments, obtaining objects, showing one's positional power, or just about anything else that supports our self image. At the end of the day, if these are not based in a real need then we are putting value on them beyond what they are actually worth.

Because people have the capacity to push their needs on others it is necessary to stop such poor behavior in its tracks. Avoidance in this situation can work but only for so long if the other person keeps demanding something. When you step up and tell them no then you should consistently do so.

It may also work the other way. For example, someone may put something on your credit report or owe you something they were not entitled to. You have the right to be polite, persistent and confident in the face of their actions. They got what they wanted so all they have to do is hope you go away.

The problem is that it wasn't theirs to begin with. You have the right to continue to pursue change and ensure they treat you fairly. Without you doing so, chances are they will not have an internal sense of values that will gnaw on their conscious. Because they lack values, they will continue to behave in such ways that are a detriment to both you and others around them.

The next time you are faced by someone who seeks their own advantage at all costs make sure your needs are known. If they are not considering your needs then break contact with them. Be persistent with your beliefs and be confident that you are in the right. You have a right to live in peach and security without someone else unnecessarily causing problems.

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